We're under the sheets and you're killing me.

It is hard to accept the mistakes you make in life. It is just as hard to forgive yourself. It is difficult to allow yourself to feel happy and content when you have disappointed yourself and especially the people around you.
I layed out an important set of morals and standards. Then, threw them away and completely disregarded everything good I stood for. The mistakes I have allowed myself to make created a person I never intended, or wanted to be. A lost person.
I was a person who thought she knew exactly who she was. I have no idea who I am anymore. I have never been so scared of everything. I don't even know if you realize that you have made me feel extremely unwanted, worthless, used and disgusting. As long as you got what you needed, your world was fine. As for my world that you so obviously didn't care about was slowly crumbling all around me. I don't like the way I never listened to the old person I was when I was around you. Who are you to make me look like a fool. I speak my mind, I am not afraid to say no, I stood up for what I believed in...until there was you. No more you ever again. No more you feeding me words you've fed to ten other girls naive hearts. There is nothing wrong with making a girl feel good about herself, but to take it to a level where you intentionally sweet talked girls until they grew attached enough for you to take it to another level, sad, and wrong.
I deserve more than a silly boy who thinks a couple sweet compliments will lure me into his death trap of cruel intentions. I let my foolishness get the best of me. I have never been so hurt and upset with myself. Nothing like this will happen again.

I realized today that it is just as hard to forgive other people who stood for better things than most people would, fall from grace. I can't believe I let myself become that person. I will find myself, I promise you that.